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Johnny,” says the teacher,
“what’s the first thing your father does in the morning?”
“He takes a shit, sir,” says Johnny.
“Oh,” says the teacher,
” and what does your father do for a living?”
“He’s a bricklayer,” says Johnny.
The teacher thinks, hmm, working-class, what else can you expect?
“Bobby,” says the teacher,
“what’s the first thing your father does in the morning?”
“He takes a sh!t, sir,” says Bobby.
“Hmm,” says the teacher, “and what does your father do for a living?”
“He’s a joiner,” says Johnny.
The teacher sees this as confirming his suspicions about the lack of linguistic skills among working-class children.
“Freddy,” he says.
“What does your father do for a living?”
“He’s a lawyer, sir” says Freddy.
“And what’s the first thing your father does in the morning?”
“He reads The Times, sir,” says Freddy.
“Interesting,” says the teacher,
” and how much time does he spend reading the paper?”
“Not long,” says Freddy,
“just until he’s finished taking a sh!t.”
