An individual’s last name plays a significant role in defining their identity. Nobody should push them to make a change. They should always have the freedom to choose.
A Reddit user PievsPi experienced this and shared her story. She is in her thirties and working as a scientist. She has multiple degrees and a developing reputation in the field she works in. That is why her last name is very important for her both personally and professionally. It is an integral part of her identity. She has published many works under this name and has used this last name throughout her life. That makes it more significant to her.
Her husband made her change her last name. He stated that if she did not change her last name, it meant she did not love him. He believes that if they did not share the same surname, they would not be considered a true family. This sentence confused her because they already had children together and considered themselves a family.
Even though she recognizes the significance of names, she is not willing to lose her professional identity. She also wants to maintain her identity. She questions if it is wrong for her to want not to change her last name.
Scroll down to read the story!
Source: PievsPi
1. Let’s find out
2. OP’s last name is very important to her. She is in her 30s and a scientist. Her last name is part of her identity and her career.
3. Her partner wants her to change her last name. He believes that if she didn’t change her last name it means she didn’t love him. And also they wouldn’t be a real family if they didn’t share the same last name.
4. She understands the importance of name that names can be meaningful. However, she is not ready to give up her sense of self or her identity as a professional. She asks if she is wrong to keep her name.
Let’s see what the AITA community thought about her the story:
By Peony-Pony:
5. She is not wrong. If her partner thinks the same name is important then he could change his last name.
By Verdivc:
6. OP can use different names for work and marriage. Or if it’s so important then the husband can change his last name.
By Sue_in_Victoria:
7. Her name is an important part of her identity and career. And if her partner believes that sharing their last name matters so much, he could change his last name. Sharing names doesn’t make a family strong.
LondonCalling07:
8. Changing your last name can be a big mistake. It can be embarrassing later on.
By iamhereforbeer:
9. In some cultures, like Korea, it’s common to keep last names. Because it’s part of their identity. Therefore, changing the name after marriage is not necessary.
By kypsikuke:
10. If OP’s partner wants to share the same name, he should change his last name. It’s not right to expect from her just because he is a man.
